We have feelings too :-|

I was born on a day when there was thunder and lightning; the wind was blowing hard and the windows were rattling their butts off. It was a large room with plenty of lights, there were many people in the room – they took turns handling me. I straight away understood that they all knew the purpose of my birth for they had a sad, disgusted look when they held me in their hands.

I was soon wrapped even though I was not feeling cold. I was put in a room with many others just like me. So many others just like me. So many that it was starting to feel suffocating and sweaty and claustrophobic and smelly. But we all knew our lives were going to get much worse than this. There was gloom filling what little air we had inside the awful room.

Then one day, the room was opened. Light. There was so much light and so much air to breathe. There was laughter. There was pink. There were cartoons. We had never known happiness and now we knew how it felt. All of a sudden I was pulled out of the room and laid down beside a baby. The baby was pretty rude as it started attacking me.

Before I knew it, I was stuck to the bottom of the baby. There is no need to say that it was smelly. It became worse when the baby pooped. When I say worse, it is in the vicinity of watching a Sajid Khan movie while getting your legs waxed and listening to the baby scream because it had gas. Oh that reminds of the smell of its gas, of which I know so much more than you ever will.

I am a diaper. We have feelings too, you know.

Disclaimer: The author of this post was in an emotionally vulnerable state after changing a particularly stinking diaper while writing this. 

P.S: Sorry for not putting the disclaimer at the beginning of the post. :-D

Friends!

The most underrated relationship in the world is the one between two girl friends. While male bonding has always been worshiped, the friendship between girls has always been made to sound too contrived and negative, or worse, silly. Really, boys are NOT all we talk about! Our media and pop culture too, hype up the relationship between two male friends about the longevity and depth of their friendship (yeh dosti hum nahi thodenge types) while it is always shown that friendship between girls get destroyed by their ego/jealousy/greed/boyfriends, etc. Our movies too, re-emphasize how brittle our friendship is, while the truth cannot be any farther. I really cannot think about a movie where the friendship between two girls has been the plot, around which the story revolves, can you?

Girl friends are the best because:

We can discuss anything with our friends that our male partners or even mothers won’t be able to understand. This includes work issues, problems with colleagues, health issues, relationship issues, or anything really.

We can still crack insensitive inside jokes about silly things that might or might not have any importance in the real world whatsoever. Try going on a long drive with your bestie and you will know what I mean!

Girlfriends make amazing babysitters. They are the best ones to trust your baby with if you and your better half want to escape away for a romantic dinner. Imagine how it would be if you were to leave your baby with a friend of your husband’s!

There is never a dull moment when you are with your girlfriend. There are always other people to gossip about. *wink wink*

Trouble in your paradise with your spouse/boyfriend? A good talk with your bestie is the best medicine. You could talk about it with her, get her ideas/solutions, or simply just vent it out of your system with a good long boo-hoo session and lots of wine.

I will save the best for the last. Girls are the best to shop with. Sorry guys, you don’t even stand a chance; you just cannot compete with girls in this one.

Social Issues Much?

There are certain social issues that I feel very strongly about – no, not the big-ass ones like women empowerment or LGBT rights or caste-ism. There are much better qualified people to do that. 

I am the small one – I worry about social issues like, “What happened to the vada-bonda shop akka? Why hasn’t she set shop for the last 10 days? The bhel puri anna who has his shop next to hers didn’t know either.” Or like, “The neighbourhood stray dog with the mean looking scar on his face hasn’t been eating the leftover bread. Hope he is alright. Maybe his stomach is upset?” You get the drift.

That said, social issues that have been protested against / the ones that have attracted the media’s eyes have not altogether been abolished. Transgenders are still being looked down upon, marital rape still hasn’t been declared a crime, Bellandur lake is still frothing (hey, detergent companies, here is a good idea for your next ad – “Secret to Bellandur lake’s extraordinary frothing - ”).

We live in a country where people are fighting for basic rights – right to good food, right to clean drinking water, right to practice any religion, right to be accepted with alternate sexuality, right to education, etc. I have problems too, da! I am also fighting, ok? – “Oh my God, the wi-fi is so frikkin’ slow!”, or “My Candy Crush lives are over!”, or “My sedan is too big in most parking spaces!” 

Most of Westerners think of India as a third-world country. But there are three different countries within India – the filthy rich, the good old middle class and the poorest of the poor. I really feel bad about our country, man. I wish I could do something to improve… hey, Ice Age is playing on TV. Let me go watch!